1964-89: Something Wicked This Way Comes

1964

THE DEVIL came in to existence during ITS MOTHER’s first marriage and ITS FATHER’s second. Its parents separated during its first year, and ITS MOTHER severed all ties with ITS FATHER. Consequently, THE DEVIL didn’t know ITS FATHER until well in to its adulthood.

1968

Four years in to its existence, ITS MOTHER married JOE PARTIER, a furniture refinisher. This was the second marriage for both. THE DEVIL claims that they partied a lot and that there was an “infidelity,” though it didn’t say whose.

1973

ITS MOTHER and JOE PARTIER separated after 5 years of marriage. THE DEVIL was 9 years old. ITS MOTHER never remarried.

1974

ITS FATHER married a third time. He was first married to the mother of THE DEVIL’S half-siblings, then to ITS MOTHER, and finally to his third wife.

1975

When THE DEVIL was 11, ITS MOTHER became engaged to MR. JONES, her former high school sweetheart. With ITS FATHER excluded from its life, THE DEVIL was free to assume ITS MOTHER’s fiancé’s surname.

It's also around this time--in a story severely lacking in detail--that THE DEVIL alleges its beloved maternal step-grandfather attempted to "touch it inappropriately" and that his actions “deeply and negatively” affected it in to its adulthood. It is interesting to note that this incident is notably missing from the Summary of Relevant History as part of THE DEVIL’S child custody evaluation/psychological profile, meaning that it didn't even bring it up in her discussion with THE PSYCHIATRIST.

(Conversely, MY LOVE's paternal grandfather actually did attempt to touch her inappropriately. Many, many times. But her family was ever watchful; she was never left alone with him and his sly attempts were always thwarted. Still, their many run-ins changed her, and she assures me that she would have most certainly raised this subject in any discussion of her childhood history with a mental health professional. So, to put it bluntly: we believe THE DEVIL lied to me about this whole "incident" to elicit my sympathy.)

· Histrionic Personality Disorder (need to be center of attention, easily influenced)
· Pathological Lying (causes: low self-esteem, need for attention)

1978

THE DEVIL, 14, entered high school where it met MY (eventual) REPLACEMENT.

1980

THE DEVIL'S "Stepfather." ITS MOTHER, 37, and MR. JONES never married, and THE DEVIL claims that MR. JONES’ violence drove ITS MOTHER “in to a women’s shelter” and the couple separated. Regardless, the 16-year-old DEVIL continued going by the alias “Jones” until its marriage on 9/11/94 (see entry).

ITS MOTHER. THE DEVIL and ITS MOTHER had a tumultuous relationship. THE DEVIL claims that they often got into “slugfests” during which they would punch and hit one another in the face and body. During this time, THE DEVIL was already drinking, partying and using illegal drugs (e.g. marijuana, cocaine, and methamphetamines), and ITS MOTHER’s drinking and partying contributed to their arguments and fistfights.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Family of Origin, p. 8: Problems began to develop between THE DEVIL and ITS MOTHER because of ITS MOTHER’s drinking and partying.

THE ALCOHOLIC. Because of the increasing violence in THE DEVIL’s relationship with ITS MOTHER, it briefly moved in with the parents of its then-boyfriend 1ST ALCOHOLIC. It returned to ITS MOTHER’s home a few months later. (See also 6/21/06.)

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Education, p. 8: THE DEVIL withheld information from THE PSYCHIATRIST concerning the facts of its leaving ITS MOTHER’s home this first time and its relationship with the 1ST ALCOHOLIC and/or its living with him and his parents; thus, this was all conspicuously absent from its psychological profile.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Arrests, Drugs, Alcohol, and Health, p. 12: Its only contact with drugs involved trying marijuana once when it was 15 or 16 and “I hated it”.

THE DEVIL also lied to THE PSYCHIATRIST concerning the scope and duration of its many years of drug abuse (~15 years); thus, he had no knowledge of this vital information when he evaluated THE DEVIL and prepared its psychological profile.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Psychopathology, p. 13: "The pattern of THE DEVIL’s MMPI-2 validity scales indicated a general level of defensiveness that is typical of adults participating in child custody evaluations. Thus it tended to be self favorable and moderately minimizing of emotional problems. However, it made an intentional effort (88th percentile) to fake good by answering too positively to[o] many of the test questions. Its resulting profile should be generally valid, but a few of the major clinical scales may be under-elevated.”

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Psychopathology, p. 13: However, its general personality make up causes it to be vulnerable to difficulties with dependency fostering drugs.

· Pathological Lying (causes: low self-esteem, need for attention)

1981-82

ITS MOTHER. During its senior year of high school, THE DEVIL and ITS MOTHER’s relationship grew more and more strained and their violent slugfests grew in frequency and intensity. At 17, THE DEVIL’s mother again kicked it out of her house.

THE DRUGGIE. THE DEVIL, 17, was in a relationship with THE DRUGGIE, 20. When THE DEVIL’s mother again kicked it out of her house, it moved in with THE DRUGGIE. According to THE DEVIL, THE DRUGGIE’s parents were “well off” and provided for him financially, leaving him with plenty of money and even more free time. THE DEVIL and THE DRUGGIE spent most of their time partying, drinking, and using drugs. THE DEVIL and THE DRUGGIE split up when it was 18 in 1982.

~4/82-4/83 – Female Roommate – Longview, WA

THE DEVIL rekindled its relationship with its former boyfriend 1ST ALCOHOLIC. They lived together for about a year during which time they partied and took lots and lots of drugs before he moved to Alaska. During this time, THE DEVIL worked at several part-time jobs and, at one point, worked as a traffic controller for a paving company.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, History of Relationships, p. 9: THE DEVIL intentionally withheld all information concerning the 1ST ALCOHOLIC from THE PSYCHIATRIST; thus, their relationship was conspicuously absent from its psychological profile.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Arrests, Drugs, Alcohol, and Health, p. 12: Its only contact with drugs involved trying marijuana once when it was 15 or 16 and “I hated it”.

THE DEVIL lied to THE PSYCHIATRIST concerning the scope and duration of its many years of drug abuse (~15 years); thus, he had no knowledge of this vital information when he evaluated THE DEVIL and prepared its psychological profile.

1983

4/83-10/83 – THE DEVIL and THE THIRD GUY – Longview, WA

THE DEVIL, 19, and THE THIRD GUY worked together at a paving company in Washington State. The two soon moved in together. During this time, THE DEVIL and THE THIRD GUY continued its habit of drinking and using drugs. They separated after ~6 months when—according to THE DEVIL—THE THIRD GUY became "physically abusive."

Note: THE DEVIL lied to the police several times claiming that I, too, had been physically abusive to it as a way to get back at me or to get its way: see 5/28/93, 10/02 and 10/20/02.

· Histrionic Personality Disorder (need to be center of attention, easily influenced)
· Pathological Lying (causes: low self-esteem, need for attention)

10/83-6/84 – Female Roommates – Seattle, WA

THE DEVIL moved to Seattle where it lived with female roommates, partying and doing drugs, for about 14 months, where it also claims to have “done some modeling.” (This is difficult to believe given the large dorsal hump deformity of bone and cartilage on the bridge of its nose. See 1990-91.)

1984

6/84-12/84 – THE DEVIL – Sacramento, CA

ITS MOTHER had previously moved to Sacramento, so THE DEVIL, 20, relocated to live with her. During this time, it managed to get a job as a cocktail waitress while attending beauty school.

1985

THE DEVIL and DRUG DEALER – San Diego, CA

THE DEVIL, 20, was offered a job driving a water truck in San Diego with the same paving company it and its live-in boyfriend THE THIRD GUY had worked for in Washington State. On a whim, it moved from Sacramento to San Diego where it lived for 1‑1/2 years. While there, it met and began a long-term relationship with DRUG DEALER, a black man who – according to THE DEVIL – was "physically abusive." THE DEVIL and DRUG DEALER continued its habit of drinking and drug abuse. See also 4/93, 9/94 and 4/30-5/1/05 entries.

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, History of Relationships, p. 9: THE DEVIL intentionally withheld all information concerning DRUG DEALER from THE PSYCHIATRIST; thus, their relationship was conspicuously absent from its psychological profile.

· Histrionic Personality Disorder (need to be center of attention, easily influenced)
· Pathological Lying (causes: low self-esteem, need for attention) 1986

Sacramento. THE DEVIL returned to Sacramento to once again live with ITS MOTHER.

THE DEVIL and OLDER GUY. Now 22, THE DEVIL had obtained its cosmetology license and was working at a hair salon when it met and began a 6-year, on-again/off-again relationship with OLDER GUY, 31. Even at this young age, THE DEVIL had already had four significant relationships (1ST ALCOHOLIC, THE DRUGGIE, THE THIRD GUY and DRUG DEALER), but had never married or reproduced. OLDER GUY had been married and divorced twice, and between his two marriages he had three children.

THE DEVIL moved from Sacramento to ITS TOWN, where it lived with OLDER GUY in his home. In the beginning of their relationship, THE DEVIL claims that OLDER GUY assured it that they would marry and reproduce. But, because of OLDER GUY’s bitter divorces and THE DEVIL’s outrageous behaviors, he was hesitant to remarry and didn’t want more children. It hoped to, but couldn’t, convince OLDER GUY to change his mind. Throughout their tumultuous relationship, OLDER GUY and THE DEVIL fought bitterly, which resulted in frequent break ups. After several days (or weeks), OLDER GUY would present THE DEVIL with flowers and expensive gifts or tickets for expensive trips. Each time, THE DEVIL would “forgive him” and they’d reconcile – even though their disagreements were most often its fault. (I didn’t know it at the time, but THE DEVIL and OLDER GUY were on just such a “break” when it and I began dating.)

· Histrionic Personality Disorder (need to be center of attention, easily influenced)
· Pathological Lying (causes: low self-esteem, need for attention)
· Borderline Personality Disorder (impulsivity, rages, fear of abandonment).

Note: Since learning about Borderline Personality Disorder, I’ve come to understand that people with BPD (or “BPDs”) often believe that if they hurt their partner so badly that they leave, and he/she still comes back to them, their partner must really love them. Since BPDs believe it’s impossible for someone to truly love them, these episodes “prove” that their partners really do love them. This was a game THE DEVIL continually played with OLDER GUY.

1988-89

THE DEVIL and TOKEN MALE (Round One)

I attracted THE DEVIL’s attention while we were driving side-by-side on the freeway. It was 25 and I was 23. It motioned for me to pull over; I did. After making small talk, it lured me to lunch. We were both in long-term, committed relationships (it with OLDER GUY and I with MY WOMAN) and didn’t pursue things further. Regardless, as superficial as this is, I wouldn’t have pursued a relationship with it anyway because I was “put off” by its large proboscis (see 1990-91 entry).

THE PSYCHIATRIST’s Report, Psychopathology, p. 14: “As these women have fairly high needs for attention they tend to be conspicuous … these women may come across as charming, outgoing, dramatic, or even seductive….”